Sunday, April 14, 2013

And Now....The Rest of the Story.....


From my Journal:  January 3

When I posted this story on my facebook page, all my friends and acquaintances bugged me for a few days to let them know how it ended.  I just realized, I never updated it here.

And now….the Rest of the Story….(from this post)

It’s Wednesday morn at crack of the dawn,
I roll out of bed and stifle my yawn.
I’m tired and cranky, not really sure why –
Until I remember last night, (with a sigh.)

There’s always something stealing my rest
While putting my patience and good humor to test!
I contemplate what the Cowboy has done
As I exit the front door, by which rests - a large gun.

I decide there and then that ignorance is bliss
Since knowing the answer could put my spirit amiss.
So, my friends, I can’t tell you how this story ends-
The interpretation thereof, on you, it depends.

All I can share is when at home I returned,
Out in the front yard a HUGE bonfire burned!

The End.
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Saturday, April 13, 2013

In Desperate Need of a "Do-Over" Day!


If cats are allowed to have nine lives, don’t you think it’s fair to give humans seven “do over” days in their lifetime?

I needed one last Saturday!  I had planned on getting things done around the house on Saturday and maybe do a little shopping. I started getting dressed for the day.  I planned on wearing this cute little outfit that consisted of a turquoise jacket, black shirt, turquoise, gray, black and white skirt, gray tights and the outfit would be finished off with gray boots and matching gray leather purse.  Cute, huh?  Maybe even an outfit for the Polyvore boards?

The Planned Outfit

During the process of getting dressed, I was interrupted and had to run outside.  I threw on a jacket and comfy clogs.  The Cowboy was outside getting ready to drive down to Temple, TX to pick up some Dall sheep.  I wasn’t going to go with him, but ended up feeling guilty.  He was running late and needed to leave immediately, so I hopped in the truck, and off we went!  We were on the road when I looked down and realized that I hadn’t finished dressing.  So, instead of wearing this:

Still the "Planned" Outfit
I ended up wearing this:

The Reality Outfit
Along the way, when we get out of the truck to get drinks and use the facilities, I feel very self-conscious about my appearance.  Did I also mention that I forgot to comb my hair?  The handsome Cowboy just saunters in everywhere we stop like he owns the place.  I notice he walks a little ahead of me, but is very solicitous to me.  I secretly think he is just trying to garner sympathy because he has such a pathetic, uncombed and unmatched wife.  What a martyr!

We meet up with our friend, load the sheep and head back home.  We are hungry and the Cowboy decides we should eat at Rudy’s Barbeque.  I don’t want to go anywhere we have to actually go in and attempt to convince him that eating and driving would be better since we need to get home and pick up the grandbaby for a night with us.  He has his mind set on Rudy’s, and in we go.  We both had to use the restroom first. 

The restaurant is laid out with long, family style tables.  You must walk past all the diners in order to get to the restroom.  Upon reaching about the middle of the dining room (and in the best spot for the most diners to see you), I feel something slither down my body!  I looked down and it was…….


My slip!! 



Around my ankles .........

(that are just above my brown shoes that don’t match my gray tights or my black, turquoise, white and gray skirt).  I am absolutely positive EVERYONE in the dining room witnessed my fiasco.  After all, they were staring at me already because of my get-up!



Normally, I’m a quick thinker, but that’s usually with a comeback that takes a dig at someone else.  I didn’t really know what to do, so I reached down, pulled the slip up over my skirt, held it around my waist and ran to the bathroom.  I am laughing at this point, but I’m not really sure if I’m laughing because I think it’s funny or I’m horrified!  I look at the Cowboy as we both enter our respective bathrooms, and he is grinning at me from ear to ear!  He obviously thinks it's hilarious.  


The Disaster

I run into the bathroom, throw the slip into the trash and lock myself in a stall.  I begin laughing hysterically and can’t stop while I’m doing my business.  During this time, two people walk into the restroom and they must think there is either a hyena or a crazy woman in there with them.  They quickly left.  When I finally left the “ladies” I was hiccupping from laughing and my eyes were still wet and watery.  People probably thought I was really upset.  The Cowboy was at the counter ordering, so I had to walk the aisle past all the diners alone.  I KNOW they were all staring at me.  And once again, they were all pitying the handsome Cowboy with the pathetic, uncombed, unmatched and now half undressed wife!


When we sit down to eat, the possibility of a new horror hits me and I lean into the Cowboy and ask, “When I pulled the slip up around my waist, did it bring my skirt with it?  OH NO!!!  Did I also moon the diners?”

The Cowboy, in his quiet way, just looked at me with a twinkle in his blue eyes, a soft, loving smile at his wife, and shrugged.

I’m currently making plans to move to Siberia where no one knows me.




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